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Falling on Deaf Ears
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Falling on Deaf Ears
"You'll never understand!" the words tastes vile in my mouth. I never wanted to be one of those kids. The saddest thing was, she never would understand at all.
"I told you once... Go." the demanding voice, unshaken crept up the stairs and through once again like a broken record I just wanted to escape from. My face burned as acid poured out of my tear ducts once more. Nothing worse than hot tears. No, that's a lie. It's worse to feel inside - I could handle my pretty face being torn apart.
"When I came home, there were no dishes in the sink... I am tired, I want to sleep."
"I SAID GO. WHY WON'T YOU LISTEN?"
"WHY WON'T YOU LISTEN?"
"You're not making any sense."
"You're the reason I am broken. The reason I am god damn crazy. You're the reason I go see the doctor so much. Just let me go. Just... Let me go." the end, though shaky, was firm. As the tears became more frequent I choked them down in silence. She couldn't see. She wouldn't see. Not today. Not ever. I was a rock. Rocks don't cry.
"Just go, like I asked" softer, but still demanding.
"You didn't hear me..."
"I heard you"
"Then what did I say?" turning her childish ways on her for once.
"Something about the doctor but it made no sense."
"You heard what I said... But you didn't hear it." I emphasized the word, hoping and praying she would catch it this once.
"Just go do the god damn dishes like I asked, I am NOT asking again" she commanded once more before a soft stomping was heard.
What felt like years passed as neither of us moved a moment. The universe held its breath, it knew what was going to happen. I was shaking, and this was it.
"No. NO. NO! WHY SHOULD I DO ANYTHING FOR YOU IF YOU NEVER LISTEN TO ME. I have so much to say. So much. But you never listen. You NEVER listen. Ever..." I never raised my voice, but there it was, even though the last words blocked my airways and it somehow snuck through the pain.
"You're not making any sense. I always listen, now for the final fucking time go do your chores."
The world around me broke, the universe let out a sigh and everything began to spin. No one would ever listen again, nor would I speak louder than that past this day. It's all yours now, this moment. You win.
Yes, master...
"I told you once... Go." the demanding voice, unshaken crept up the stairs and through once again like a broken record I just wanted to escape from. My face burned as acid poured out of my tear ducts once more. Nothing worse than hot tears. No, that's a lie. It's worse to feel inside - I could handle my pretty face being torn apart.
"When I came home, there were no dishes in the sink... I am tired, I want to sleep."
"I SAID GO. WHY WON'T YOU LISTEN?"
"WHY WON'T YOU LISTEN?"
"You're not making any sense."
"You're the reason I am broken. The reason I am god damn crazy. You're the reason I go see the doctor so much. Just let me go. Just... Let me go." the end, though shaky, was firm. As the tears became more frequent I choked them down in silence. She couldn't see. She wouldn't see. Not today. Not ever. I was a rock. Rocks don't cry.
"Just go, like I asked" softer, but still demanding.
"You didn't hear me..."
"I heard you"
"Then what did I say?" turning her childish ways on her for once.
"Something about the doctor but it made no sense."
"You heard what I said... But you didn't hear it." I emphasized the word, hoping and praying she would catch it this once.
"Just go do the god damn dishes like I asked, I am NOT asking again" she commanded once more before a soft stomping was heard.
What felt like years passed as neither of us moved a moment. The universe held its breath, it knew what was going to happen. I was shaking, and this was it.
"No. NO. NO! WHY SHOULD I DO ANYTHING FOR YOU IF YOU NEVER LISTEN TO ME. I have so much to say. So much. But you never listen. You NEVER listen. Ever..." I never raised my voice, but there it was, even though the last words blocked my airways and it somehow snuck through the pain.
"You're not making any sense. I always listen, now for the final fucking time go do your chores."
The world around me broke, the universe let out a sigh and everything began to spin. No one would ever listen again, nor would I speak louder than that past this day. It's all yours now, this moment. You win.
Yes, master...
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